All over the country, thousands of children have lost someone dear to them. Their pain’s only made worse by the inability to find closure with the rituals of a funeral, or even say goodbye before they pass.
Coping with children and grief is made even harder by the fact that you’re probably grieving yourself. Although nobody wants to be in this situation, remember that helping a child work through their grief will help you go through the process too.
When and how to talk to children about grieving for someone they love
Don’t delay telling them about the tragedy, children are extremely perceptive and they’ll know something’s wrong. Break the news before they hear from someone else.
A child’s ability to deal with death depends enormously on how calmly and clearly you explain the situation to them. Talking to them as soon as possible helps them deal with the range of emotions they’re bound to witness in other family members too.
Here’s how to start the conversation:
- Speak slowly and plainly so it’s easier for them to understand what’s going on
- Answer their questions as honestly as possible
- Use age-appropriate language
- Address their fears about you or them contracting COVID and dying by explaining that you are taking every precaution to protect yourselves.
There’s no correct way for children (or adults) to deal with grief. Everyone has to follow their own path to healing. Your child may act out, they may become withdrawn, or they may seem totally accepting of the situation.
Keeping open and honest channels of communication is the best way to deal with children and grief. Try to stay as positive as you can, and don’t neglect your own emotions in the process.
Eventually, this too will pass, and you can focus on sharing positive memories of your loved ones and remembering how special they were to you.